It might be a rite of passage for students to spend hours of their weekend in Biotech Commons or work in Fisher Fine Arts until they’re kicked out for closing. It is almost an expectation for students to devote themselves entirely to their studies. After all, Penn is the No. 10 ranked university in the nation and one of the top colleges in the world. However, at what point will we learn to distinguish our personal identities from the identity we’ve curated as a Penn student?
Because of the constant competitive culture on campus, students are forced to compensate by overworking themselves. I’m sure that if you were to take a trip to Van Pelt Library right now, you’d find multiple students hunched over on their desks, face-planted on their laptop keyboards, and sound asleep from exhaustion. I too have fallen victim to overworking myself and spending more hours than I’m proud of confined to a GSR, hoping that excessive studying will help me catch up to the caliber of the students around me. While it’s no secret that Penn students are some of the most brilliant in the country, embracing this narrative will aid us in accepting that it's okay to work at your own pace.
Like many Quakers on campus, I allow doubt to question whether I’m doing enough to be successful. Comparison is said to be the thief of joy, and my Penn experience has proven this notion correct. Too often, I fear that I’m not pushing myself in the classroom. I question my intelligence, and I allow comparison to discount my own accomplishments. What I’ve come to realize is that I’ve completely lost sight of why I picked Penn to begin with.
Sure, we all have personal reasons for choosing Penn, but we all share the same general purpose for choosing to further our education — an aspiration to bolster our knowledge. Some chose Penn for prestige, job output, or because of the many excellent programs on campus. More generally, we all chose Penn because we want to continue learning and growing as both students and people. Why are we no longer content with the fact that we are attending this university for the sake of learning and growing? Why do we allow the negativity that comes with being a competitive Penn student to consume who we are?
What excited me the most about moving to college was the opportunity to explore who I am as a person and establish what I want to become. The sad reality is that when I think of Penn and my life in Philadelphia, I’m overcome with feelings of emptiness, as if something is missing. Because of the sheer hours that I spend trying to “catch up” to others around me, I’ve failed to spend time pursuing what I enjoy and what interests me. The issue embedded in the culture of our campus is that for so many Quakers, it's normal to allow yourself to be consumed by the cutthroat personality that Penn students curate in an attempt to never let anyone see you sweat.
These walls that Penn students put up are significant barriers that prevent forming genuine connections. Not to mention the fact that constantly sporting Penn Face is no doubt unsustainable. As students, it's important to hold ourselves to high academic standards. However, it's so much more important that, as people, we take advantage of the chance to better ourselves through the relationships that we form and the new experiences we’re living.
There is no one solution to perfectly combat becoming a Penn Face zombie, but it's important to begin by sticking true to your beliefs. It’s so easy to get lost in the majority and lose sight of who you are and what you stand for. Embracing the most authentic version of yourself will aid in becoming the person you want to become in the future. It’s also important to note that, as students, we shouldn’t fear vulnerability. At Penn, it's difficult for students to be transparent about the grades they received on a midterm, much less their feelings or relationships. However, opening up will attract the characters that resonate with your honesty and authenticity. As opposed to fearing it, embracing vulnerability will make developing genuine connections so much easier.
Most importantly, we owe it to ourselves to explore who we are through the city of Philadelphia. As Penn students, we have access to America’s sixth largest city — a place with rich culture and multitudes of opportunities right at our fingertips. Still, most people prefer to confine themselves to the mundane and comfortable bubble of Penn’s campus. It has been difficult navigating the identity that I have at Penn. I still don’t know who I am yet, but taking a quick trip east into Center City is a really big step in the right direction.
ELIJAH RAMIREZ is a College first year studying political science from El Paso, TX. His email is elijah11@sas.upenn.edu.
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