Ernest Owens
The Ernest Opinion
It’s October. The time of year when the old and new of Penn collide. Alumni visit during Homecoming. Prospective students tour the campus. But there’s something that unites these two groups — their parents.
Yes, proud Penn parents are the makers of the student body. They birth us, fund us and — most of all — serve as the backbone of Penn. They want the best for their little overachievers. But where is the line drawn between motivating us for the future and determining it for us? Penn parents — prospective and present — should facilitate, not dictate, the career paths of their children.
I remember having my roommate break the news to his parents during fall break that he resented pre-med and was considering studying philosophy instead. Not only were they enraged, but they threatened to remove him from Penn if he even dared to mention it again. Today, he is in his second biology course — loathing every second of it — and this hatred is reflected in his midterm scores.
There are some Penn parents who believe that such behavior from other parents reflects a sign of the times.
Laurie Howard, a former Penn parent, said that she “knows many parents consumed with getting their return on investment from the education of their kids.” She found it “appalling that somehow the idea of getting an education is superseded by the goal of getting a job.” Current economic hardship has definitely served as a reason for parents’ suspension of their children’s academic wishes.
Some Penn parents believe that there is good reason to prepare their children’s career after graduation.
Cassandra Johnson, a freshman parent, said she and her husband “have a tremendous amount of influence” on their daughter’s post-Penn career goals. When they are not “networking with business associates to gain perspectives on the economy and globalization,” she said they are “confident that minoring in Mandarin Chinese is a door-opening opportunity and will give her many choices as it relates to her career goals.” However, has the question ever arisen whether her daughter ever wanted to study Mandarin or if that was even an opportunity to further her own personal endeavors?
Karu Kozuma, executive director of the Office of Student Affairs, said he believes that “out of love, families want to make sure their children are going to be successful and want to know how they are doing on a regular basis. Without the ability to see them on a daily basis, it is a challenge, and the plea to be in constant communication may present to students another piece to balance.”
And this is where my message to proud Penn parents comes in.
First, I am insensitive to your mission. You have birthed and raised your child to become a fine Ivy League Quaker who is already off to the right start. However, there comes a time when one must grow up and form independent decisions, and such choices must be made without parental authorization.
Second, Penn is not just a pre-professional college. It is a liberal arts university, and you should be thankful for it. Your children go to a school where they are encouraged to think beyond what they have been taught. Altering their ability to explore the unknown academically is hindering their college experience.
Third, give your child more credit than you think. At the end of the day, as much as you pay tuition and fund other personal endeavors, the proud Penn student should matter more than the proud Penn parent. The students are the ones taking these courses; they are the ones that have to face this new world of technology and socialization. If anything, they are more informed than you on what suits them best for their careers because they will eventually be the ones doing it.
And lastly, support your Quaker in whatever he or she pursues. When I first came to Penn, I was a pre-law student double-majoring in political science and international relations. Last week, I declared my major in communication and public policy, and my mother was pleased that I finally found something I was passionate about.
“Follow your passion — what feels intuitively comfortable for you, not what everyone else would like you to do,” Howard said. “Otherwise, you will be miserable, uneasy and unfulfilled.”
Ernest Owens, an Undergraduate Assembly representative, is a College sophomore from Chicago, Ill. His email address is owense@sas.upenn.edu. The Ernest Opinion appears every Friday.
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