Hassall-Free Fridays | Athletically apathetic, and proud of it

I came to a bemusing realization the other day. I am a senior entering my final semester at Penn, and I have never attended a Penn football game — or any kind of Penn sports game at all. And it seems that I’m not alone. A quick search of The Daily Pennsylvanian archives unveils endless lines written about the supposed travesty of Penn students’ lack of interest in our sports teams and their endeavors.

The conventional explanation is that our non-attendance is indicative of a lack of school spirit or pride, a view frequently articulated by alumni in the DP’s comments sections and by that one adorable yet overly peppy Penn Band friend we’ve all picked up over the years. Perhaps that’s true. While we may all own a lot of Penn-branded shirts, I know I’m not the only one who uses the clothing section of the bookstore as a laundry-avoidance strategy. Penn holds no major pep rallies (full disclosure: I’m not completely sure I even know what those are), and I’m pretty certain our cheerleaders are an urban legend. The hallmarks of American television high-school pride are all missing.

But that’s the thing — Penn isn’t a high school. Penn is an elite university whose principal purpose is the provision of excellent academic education to its students. Nor is Penn a member of that class of universities that greatly excel at a particular sport and take sensible and reasoned steps to brand themselves in relation to it. Indeed, when the proponents of greater sport attention at Penn claim otherwise, the rest of us are left to point out that, in sports, “Ivy” is a fairly significant qualifier for “champion.”

Yet we allow that small subset of the student population, chiefly sports teams themselves and members of the marching band, to define Penn’s school spirit in their own very narrow, very high school-inspired terms. We sit back and nod quietly as we’re told that not showing up for The Line or not throwing toast at Franklin Field makes us bad Quakers.

It’s time to stop. It’s time instead to revel in the many ways, unrelated to sports, that we — the great un-attending masses — celebrate our school. The things that most of us love about Penn, the things we’re proud of, have nothing to do with the athletics program. Penn is a wonderful and unique school, boasting great classes and brilliant professors, some beautiful buildings, an endless smorgasbord of campus organizations to get involved with and the city of Philadelphia itself. All of those things are much more an essential part of Penn than any sports team is. Indeed, I’d be tempted to throw onto that list such vital elements as Hemo’s, Yue Kee and the local Indian buffets.

We show our pride in similarly diverse fashions. I make a habit of taking trips down to the Penn Museum of Archaeology and Anthropology to marvel at the treasures contained inside, while you may prefer to spend your time practicing with Penn Swingers. You encourage your family and friends to come visit, while I spare Penn from mine by exaggerating the crime problem. Above all else, most of us work hard in our classes to honor the purpose for which Penn exists: to provide us all with a great education.

None of this is to delegitimize the beliefs of those who do choose to put Penn sports at the center of their conception of the University. That’s their right, and I wish them well with it. To alumni who wish things were still like the proverbial good old days: I’m sorry your school has changed. But nobody — neither band members nor football players nor even the administration — has any business telling me how to love and respect my school. While I’ll likely end my time here without ever having attended a sports game, that doesn’t mean I won’t walk out proud.

Luke Hassall is a College senior from Auckland, New Zealand. His e-mail address is hassall@theDP.com. Hassall-Free Fridays appears on alternate Fridays.

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