Simeon McMillan | Inaccurate rankings

Surveying your very own tour guides is about as unbiased as holding a Russian election. Sure it's democratic, but we all know how it's going to turn out.

The Admissions office should have known better than to send the annual Princeton Review questionnaire to its student ambassadors from the Kite and Key Society. Unsurprisingly, the Princeton Review voided much of the survey data collected from Penn instead of including it in its annual College guidebook.

But while I adore chastising the administration as much as the next student columnist, this whole issue is much ado about nothing. Any high-school senior seeking admission to Penn should have the wherewithal to discern perception from reality when evaluating the never-ending deluge of college rankings.

For the most part, the Princeton Review's Best 366 Colleges: 2008 Edition paints an accurate portrayal of Penn. Our ranking as the No. 8 "Toughest to Get Into" mirrors admissions trends.

And after witnessing 8,000 Ivy League scholars sing the words "you's a ho'" and "move, bitch" with such intellectual fervor at Friday's Ludacris concert, I think our reputation as "thinkers and drinkers" seemed well deserved.

However, it wasn't the Princeton Review's facts, but rather its omissions about Penn, which left me slightly perturbed. At the risk of sounding elitist, not seeing Penn's name on certain lists would leave any admissions officer bitterly clinging to religion and his gun.

Despite praising our undergrads for grabbing some of "the country's most prestigious jobs," Penn was surprisingly snubbed for "Best Career Placement," failing to make the top 20.

Put away those " Not Penn State " shirts. Apparently their students, ranked the No. 3 for "Lots of Beer" and No. 17 for "Lots of Hard Liquor," were deemed far more employable than your friendly neighborhood Whartonite. But I don't take the snub personally. Fellow Ivy League laggards such as Harvard, Princeton and Yale were similarly passed over when it came to employability, in favor of Clemson, the No. 1 " Jock School," and University of Missouri-Rolla, No. 14 in "Class Discussions Rare."

Fortunately, most high-school seniors considering Penn who I spoke with are above the popularity contests.

"The fact they sent [the survey] out to a select group of people inside of a general group doesn't impact how I view the school," said Paul Lyandres, a high-school senior from California. "What matters is not the ranking in the newspaper but the name your school carries."

To defend the proud name of my soon-to-be alma mater, I decided to take the Princeton Review survey myself. Research purposes aside, there was something enticing about having the power to influence the decisions of some of America's most anal high-school seniors.

Upon commencement of the survey, I quickly became skeptical of its validity. For the question requesting your class, answer choices ranged from the standard "frosh" and "sophomore" to the unnecessarily ambiguous "don't know."

Forget tour guides; all surveys from students who "don't know" what class they are in should be voided. If it's possible for you to lose count between the years one and four, you clearly aren't qualified to be giving advice to the children of America.

Seriously though, I fully expect the University's strengths to shine, no matter who filled out the questionnaire. And as Interim Dean of Admissions Eric Kaplan told The Daily Pennsylvanian, "It is the prerogative of the Princeton Review to survey whomever they choose."

But instead of worrying about Penn's image, maybe we should thank the Princeton Review for doing us a favor. Seeing which prospects can discern fact from fiction may be a test truer than any our admissions office could ever give.

Simeon McMillan is a Wharton senior from Long Island, NY. His e-mail is mcmillan@dailypennsylvanian.com. Common $ense appears Thursdays.

Please note All comments are eligible for publication in The Daily Pennsylvanian.