Collin Beck | Nothing but a number

"Tired of bio labs and calculus homework? Take Shakespeare!" says a commercial on the Penn Video Network. "Hamlet: Incest! Murder! Mayhem!"

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!

And who wouldn't want to switch integral tables for a little incest? As recently released data from the College of Arts and Sciences points out, the average grade for a humanities class is 3.53, while in the natural sciences it's just 3.13.

Why the disparity? One reason is that Humanities tend to be smaller classes, and those in smaller classes receive higher grades.

In a previous article in The Daily Pennsylvanian, Associate Dean of the College and director of Academic Affairs Kent Peterman attributed some of this difference to the fact that a smaller class lets "professors know students personally and encourages high performance." He also mentioned that they tend to attract more advanced students.

This is all probably true, but he fails to mention the bigger factors. For one, it's harder to give a student a bad grade when you know him or her on a personal basis. Have you ever met someone for the first time and thought, "Man, this kid is an idiot?"

I remember freshman year in a class about angels (yes, with wings), this kid talked about how demons routinely impregnated women during the 1980's. My jaw dropped to the floor in disbelief.

But as the semester went on, we got to know him and grew accustomed to his rants. Eventually, it was just normal. We even wanted to know more. Are there female demons that impregnate men? Where can I find them? Should I buy them a drink first?

This doesn't happen in science or math classes. Someone who thinks 10 times 10 equals a bigger 10 is still an idiot at the end of the semester, regardless of how nice a guy he is.

Math and science classes, especially at the intro level, also don't need to give out good grades to attract students.

Many majors require Calculus, and a lot of kids want to be doctors (to help people and to pick up chicks). This means physics, bio and chemistry classes are in high demand no matter how hard, uninteresting, ineffective or generally terrible they are. These kids would study abroad at Guantanamo Bay if it meant a better chance of wearing a stethoscope in ten years.

Meanwhile, unless there's a sudden demand for literary theorizing, the English departments of the world must resort to pimping themselves out on Penn Video Network and other such tactics.

Consider the differences in scheduling. I was only able to find two English classes that began before 10, while Calculus recitations routinely started at 8 and 9 am. Is the sun even up that early? Do math majors have to carry around UV lamps to scare off nightgoers like in I am Legend? I'm curious.

This relatively harsh treatment does a disservice to the science departments as it discourages many students who display genuine interest. College freshman Charles Lynch is considering majoring in math, but is a little worried about the grading. "I know I'd have to work a lot harder to get the same GPA."

Should the natural sciences really try to weed out anyone who'd rather enjoy college than play with orgo models all day? Aren't, like, half of all scientific advances made by people getting creative and making mistakes? Don't we need people like me to try to fuse two elements together and screw up, accidentally inventing a new flavor of Pop Rocks? I think we do.

Delicious popping snacks aside, the discrepancy generally isn't a big problem because it's widely acknowledged. Employers and law schools often take a person's major into account when they're assessing an applicant's GPA.

The problem arises when the University doesn't look at the other factors when evaluating students.

The Office of Fraternity and Sorority Affairs, for example, rose the bar to join a fraternity from a 2.15 to 2.5. A 2.5 GPA may be easy for some, but to those taking intro classes curved to a B-/C+, it can be challenging.

It's not fair to set a standard based solely on GPA. Until there's some sort of standardization across the University, GPA ain't nothin' but a number.

Collin Beck is a College senior from Minot, ND. His e-mail is beck@dailypennsylvanian.com. The Dakota Kid appears alternating Thursdays.

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