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The news anchor was talking to two guests as a ticker scrolled along the bottom of the screen. "Do Democrats cause cancer?" it asked. "Find out at Foxnews.com."

I laughed. It was a Sunday night in March 2003, and The Simpsons was parodying its corporate cousin, Fox News, despite threats of an internal lawsuit. I found it funny. Two years removed, I still find it funny. Only now, I see another question worth asking.

Does Penn Transit cause cancer?

Consider this: During the average person's lifespan, diesel exhaust will be responsible for more than 3,000 cases of cancer in the Philadelphia metropolitan area, says the Clean Air Council, an environmentalist group.

Penn Transit's 14 buses run on pure petroleum diesel. And "pure" diesel contains 40 toxic substances, including arsenic, formaldehyde, ammonia and cyanide. Even the business-loving Environmental Protection Agency has declared diesel a "likely human carcinogen." Other studies have blamed diesel emissions for 70 percent of cancers linked to air pollution.

Yet diesel powers the big white Penn Transit buses, which make a total of 15 stops, 20 times a day along two routes that run through campus.

"But I don't take the buses," you say. "I only take the shuttle van, which loops around campus a few times during the day and then is on call through 898-RIDE at night. How bad can that be?"

Well, Penn's 23 vans run on gasoline instead of diesel, so they won't directly harm you. But the vans will harm the environment -- because the Ford Club Wagons that Penn uses are the least efficient passenger vans on the market, according to the EPA.

In fact, the EPA said these Fords release about 12 tons of greenhouse gas emissions every 15,000 miles. Most cars don't release half that much.

On an EPA Air Pollution Scale of zero to 10, they rate 0.83 on average. And yes, zero means the most pollution and 10 the least.

So Penn finds itself in an odd position. On the one hand, its facilities are lauded as green-friendly. Just last month, the EPA named Penn the top university consumer of renewable energy for using wind to power 10 percent of its electricity needs.

But then there's the other hand, the hand that steers toxin-spewing buses from one green building to the next.

How, then, to resolve the contradiction?

As Fox News might suggest, look to the Bible Belt. There, the University of Georgia is pioneering the use of blended biodiesel fuel in its fleet of 45 buses.

First, some background. Biodiesel is a petroleum-free fuel made from animal fat or vegetable oil. Technically, it's comprised of "mono-alkyl esters of long chain fatty acids."

But that's not important. What's important is the benefit: Biodiesel is non-toxic, biodegradable and virtually free of carcinogenic compounds.

The University of Georgia plans to take advantage of these benefits by building its own biodiesel plant to fuel its buses. The plant, which will be finished in 2007, will manufacture B20, or blended fuel that is 20-percent biodiesel and 80-percent diesel.

Not only can this blend be used in a regular diesel engine, but studies show it reduces carbon monoxide and dangerous particulate emissions by up to 11 percent.

The only downside may be a slight increase in NOx -- smog -- but that's uncertain.

The University of Georgia will also complete another plant within the next few months that will produce ethanol to fuel the school's 600 non-diesel cars and trucks. Ethanol is an alcohol that can be mixed with gasoline to produce fuel blends with less petroleum.

No one expects the University to construct its own biodiesel plants, for which Penn has neither the space nor the resources. Still, the University wouldn't have to make its own biodiesel or ethanol in order to use those fuels, as many companies currently produce them. Actually, in Minnesota, all gasoline must be 10-percent ethanol by law.

Unfortunately -- in this respect only -- Philly is far from Minnesota, and Penn administrators say biodiesel and ethanol have been hard to acquire here.

Not anymore.

The University City District, a non-profit neighborhood improvement group, is currently searching for a fuel company to open a filling station in West Philly and offer biodiesel within the next few months. It would be like any other gas station, but would offer pumps containing alternative fuel blends.

"We want a central station that everyone could use," said Lewis Wendell, the district's executive director. "Penn, Drexel, the average resident. Anyone."

Penn needs to work with the district to bring biodiesel to West Philadelphia, and, perhaps, an ethanol-blend pump, too. The former could stop the carcinogen spread, while the latter could help improve van efficiency.

It's time Penn got on the bus.

Gabriel Oppenheim is a College freshman from Scarsdale, N.Y. Opp-Ed appears on Fridays.

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