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[Stephen Owens/ The Daily Pennsylvanian]

Today is the busiest travel day of the year. Once you're finished with the crossword puzzle and the Sudoku -- and you still can't see the end of the conga-line at the Philadelphia airport -- you're going to be pretty damn bored. With that in mind, I have prepared some Penn-themed logic puzzles for you to complete on your way home. Whether you're getting there by Amtrak, SEPTA, NJTransit or your time-share Lear jet, I hope you have a Happy Thanksgiving weekend!

Puzzle 1:

You are at World Cafe Live. World Cafe Live has an incident between students and Penn Police. The Penn Police always lie; they never tell the truth. Penn students always tell the truth. You see a person and want to see if he is a student or a police officer. You want a student. You can ask him only one question. Which question will you ask him to know for sure whether he is a student?

Answer: You don't. You ask his lawyer.

Puzzle 2:

Sze is going to visit a friend but has forgotten his friend's college house name. Can you help him?

There are eleven different college houses. His friend does not live in the dorm formerly known as Goldberg, nor does he live in the building with electrical issues. Sze knows that his friend appreciates heat but does not live in the dorm named for the Chairman of the Board of Trustees of the University of Pennsylvania. On three occasions, his friend couldn't use the elevators or the hot water. Is his friend in High Rise North, Hamilton or Rodin College House?

Answer: His friend is now at the Sheraton, after a pipe burst -- destroying all of his personal possessions and his dreams for a better life in America.

Puzzle 3:

If the early application rate increases 21 percent for the Class of 2010, and the yield hovers around 66 percent and Penn decides to admit 48 percent of the class through early decision, how many people in the incoming class will have dealt with a major issue in their lives which has totally shaped who they are as a person and has made them see the world differently, which they can then summarize neatly on page 217 of their hypothetical autobiography? How many will be from New Jersey?

Answer: Everyone, God-willing, will be from New Jersey. Penn tries to create a diverse class, with equal numbers of people from North Jersey, Central Jersey, South Jersey and the Shore. Penn hopes that people from North and South Jersey will use their four years to really set aside their differences and get to know one another.

Puzzle 4:

Kushol, Greer, Adam and Tuby are Whartonites and must cross Spruce Street at night to go to Wawa for caffeine. All four begin on the same side of 38th Street. You must help them across to the other side. It is night and the light only lasts for 17 seconds. A maximum of two people can cross at any one time. Any party who crosses must have the green light. All four walk at different speeds. A pair must cross at the slower person's pace.

Kushol -- 1 second

Greer -- 2 seconds

Adam -- 5 seconds

Tuby -- 10 seconds

Can you get them across in 17 seconds?

Answer: No. You start to cross, the light turns yellow and then quickly red. You are hit by a car and die.

Puzzle 5:

Jackie lives on the 20th floor of Hamilton. Every day she takes the elevator to go down to the ground floor go shopping or to work. When she returns she takes the elevator to the seventh floor and walks up the stairs to reach her apartment on the 20th floor. She hates walking, so why does she do it?

Answer: She is not a midget. She simply cannot stand waiting while everyone presses the button for every floor.

Puzzle 6:

Penn recently acquired the postal lands. Penn has formed many different committees to decide what to do with these lands. There is a man lying dead on the postal lands. How did he die?

Answer: He's been waiting for months outside Moravian Cafe for Taco Bell to open.

I hope you enjoy the puzzles and that you're not stuck in traffic for too long today. My commute home will take roughly 15 minutes. For once, it isn't such a bad thing to be from South Jersey. Happy Thanksgiving!

Melody Joy Kramer is a senior English major from Cherry Hill, N.J. Perpendicular Harmony appears on Wednesdays.

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