A 'Lullaby' and a few dirty jokes

Giving birth to a sandpaper baby through his urethra, a perverted neighbor who watched his sister, a psychotic mother and adventures with strangers and gigantic bottles of Vicatin are all part of the life of novelist Chuck Palahniuk.

"You've got Vicatin, and you've got a party," is just one of outrageous pieces of humor that was delivered to a packed house in the Penn Bookstore by the author of the cult hit Fight Club.

"I would rather tell dirty stories, answer questions and call it a night," Palahniuk said.

Speaking in the articulate and descriptive prose of a novelist, Palahniuk declared that his initial inspiration for his newly-released novel, Lullaby, was at "Bed, Bath and Beyond, [shopping] for a wedding gift for a friend." Noticing that "one civilization's sacred object becomes the decoration of the next" civilization, the novel involves a lethal African chant found in American society.

The exhausted author, on the last leg of a tour promoting Lullaby's release, signed dozens upon dozens of his novels before speaking for an hour and then meeting every fan that came to see him.

"One of these days," Palahniuk commented in response to a sudden lull in the crowd's noise, "it's gonna get quiet like that, and I'm going to look up, and there'll be someone with a gun."

Palahniuk's language, just like that of his books, is anything but clean. His host of vulgar stories and colorful anecdotes kept the audience roaring with laughter.

"There's no market for funny hijacker movies now," Palahniuk said, reflecting on his novel Survivor and its halted transformation into what will hopefully become a Hollywood blockbuster.

Several audience members asked Palahniuk if he borrowed material from another author. Palahniuk replied that he had not heard of the author in question, prompting another audience member to ask, "The Bible: true or false?"

Palahniuk's immediate reply: "I haven't read that."

"I like this open format... [You] get more of a feel for what the [author] is like," said Hugh Gilmore, a used bookstore owner who noted Palahniuk as one of his favorite authors.

"It was good to put a voice behind the books," College sophomore Michael Lopez said. "He's not quite what I imagined... [He's] much more extroverted."

"I can't say my work is original," Palahniuk said, grinning. He said that people like his material because "it's a lot of verbs," and something is always happening.

Palahniuk was candid about how he writes a story with a good plot twist.

"I never know where the plot's going," he said. "I have to be transformed by the events in the book... as the protagonist is."

Living in Portland, Ore. for two decades, Palahniuk has spent the last nine years writing. In fact, Palahniuk has two new books ready for release in the near future.

"Writing now is easier than it has ever been," he said.

Demonstrating his love for what he does, Palahniuk told the audience that the word "storyteller is such a nice way to say liar," and that "it's not okay not to write."

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