Porn, chicken and the new Ivy League expression

If you've ever dreamt of starring in a porn movie, raise your hand -- but not in public. If it's up, that's just fine. Your dreams can come true. Just transfer to Yale. Last week, a student club calling themselves Porn 'n' Chicken publicly announced plans to produce a pornographic movie featuring an all-Bulldog cast. Traditionally, Porn 'n' Chicken was a student group that gathered to watch good pornographic movies, eat copious amounts of fried chicken and drink beer. Their upcoming release of The Staxxx, however, has signaled a more proactive mission. Admittedly strange, but simply understood. Students watched porn together. Such a popular activity, it became a club. Whatever. We always knew Yale was a bit different. But Porn 'n' Chicken's most recent project has created some serious buzz. The New York Times ran an article entitled "Yale's New Grades: A, B, C, D and X," which set off the media landslide. MTV News, Hustler, Brill's Content and even Danish National Radio followed with reports of their own. A reporter from the New Yorker attended the Porn 'n' Chicken's latest meeting. Hollywood likes it too -- apparently three agents are interested in talking to the students about a potential deal. Yale's naughty thinking has piqued interest nationwide, revealing a surprisingly broad market for such a strange appeal. Imagine what would happen if the market for Ivy League porn caught on. Talks would soon start swirling about hush-hush, anonymous, super secret, steamy startups here at Penn. For example, "The Porn and Cheesesteak Club." Scene locations would potentially include the third floor bathroom in Steiny-D, the button and several high-rise elevators. Inevitably, the Quaker mascot would also somehow have to be included. But despite the market potential and on-campus interest, the kids in New Haven can take the lead on this one. Thankfully, the Yale porn stars are trying to remain humbled and focused in the midst of the media blitz. Their e-mail release said, "Honestly, we're trying to not let the media affect the shooting of our film and our regular weekly meetings... We find it all rather absurd." Absurd is right. Without producing anything tangible, the individuals responsible for this stunt captured the national spotlight, and raised a blushed smile from students everywhere. The national reaction to The Staxxx is boggling and outlandish. If anyone is looking for evidence of media idiocy, here's your field day. Students having sex in a library is worth a chuckle, but hardly warrants an article in the Times. Funny, the kids outsmarted the adults on this one. Porn 'n' Chicken even has the support of their administration. One Yale dean commented in the Yale Daily News that at Yale, "everybody is welcome to express themselves." Paste that quote on the prospectus please. But it gets better. The Staxxx could earn its participants scholar merit badges. The YDN reported a former Yale instructor remarking, "If this is elevated to a conscious discussion between faculty, administration and students, in which the filmmakers feel safe to explore the implications of their work, this could be an extremely interesting and fruitful discussion." Gosh, academia and institutions can be so endearing. Admittedly, the concept of Ivy League porn is unique. We've always typecast the stars of that stage to double-D bimbos and eighth grade dropouts. Intelligent participants could add a new dynamism to the industry. Imagine if the next generation of pornlettes and their male companions were, for example, Ivy League English majors. For one thing, the dialogue would certainly improve. But the national reaction to The Staxxx suggests something broader. The story must have struck a chord in the subconscious of classes and groups not used to addressing such lewd subjects that occur in the libraries of storied institutions. Could this latest scandal connote that the production of smut, from funding through filming, actively entices even the elites and intelligencia? "Americana erotica" -- that'll be a good name for the cocktail circuit. It has always been publicly forbidden for certain classes to indulge in porn, much less participate in its creation. Porn 'n' Chicken, real or not, challenged that assumption. And their members are now reveling in their sexuality. If Yale kids can do it -- still, semi-anonymously -- then you can too.

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