Column: The Spoils of Oil

"Thanks for the news," I thought. "But, we all realize its importance." The professor went on with his well-rehearsed sketch. And with flatus-breath and flailing hands, he managed to keep me awake with his tally of oil utilization. He said, "It's used in manufacturing polymers . . . from the pen you're pushing to your toothbrush." How brutally ironic I thought as my eyes watered from his noxious exhale. Some days later, Gorbachev visited the U.S. and announced he would like to make a full-scale, nuclear arms reduction agreement. What a good idea, considering at that point the world had the nuclear equivalent of 1200 pounds of dynamite for every breathing human. I'm no explosive expert, but that's got to be enough to send the baseball plus the whole batter over the 400 foot mark, dead center. Anyway, Reagan looked delighted with his Hollywood smile and ruddy cheeks. But, what was he or the in-coming Bush administration supposed to do with the enormous stock-pile of military crap he had created? Well, at that point we still couldn't thoroughly trust those pinkos, or for that matter anyone. I mean let's not forget what World War II taught us. Between Pearl Harbor and the Nazi decimation of the Soviet military, how the hell can you trust anyone? So, perhaps it wouldn't go to waste after all. Time would tell. So, we sat complacent like gruel in a bowl and reeled in giddy excitement to what looked like the end of the cold war. Our bliss came to an end when Saddam Hussein decided to annex Kuwait. Those crazy Arabs. What did they think they were doing? Were they crazy? Our media portrayed them as fanatics. But, could they all really be nuts? Especially when so many have a deep hatred of Israel and the west? There must be some validity to the Palestinians' grievances. There must have been some validity to Saddam Hussein's move against the oil-rich Gulf States. But Bush handled it so well, "Complete and unconditional surrender!" In we went with guns-a-blazin' and the question of our involvement covered with a cloak of obligation to reverse this injustice. Bullshit! It was about oil and keeping Chevron and Exxon happy. Surrender my foot. Saddam is still in power, possibly sitting on the technology to build nuclear weapons. The Kuwaiti oil wells are still on fire. And even after our Gulf War alliance with the Soviets, we still don't have a comprehensive nuclear weapons reduction agreement. The Bush-Reagan administration has failed on all fronts internationally, from nuclear arms reduction to the Gulf War to environmental protection. The proof is in what's going on now. The Bush administration is introducing a new energy bill that will open part of a National Wildlife Refuge in Alaska for oil drilling. I don't want to sound like a self-righteous environmentalist. God knows I had my fill of those punks, . . . with their ponytails, paisley and Birkenstocks . . . preaching, "Release undersized trout! Help maintain fish numbers!" But, for God sakes, isn't it obvious that Bush is avoiding the inevitable? The fact is we're going to have to find alternative fuels sooner or later. The world's oil supply isn't infinite. So, why not leave the wilderness alone and start the transition now? And don't give me your crap about the dangers of the United States being energy dependent. We're pigs! We use 25 percent of the world's oil and claim only about 3.5 percent of the reserves. As long as we continue to consume at this rate it is impossible for us to be self-sufficient. Hopelessly obstinate Bush is handling this about as well as he handled the Gulf. He's vowed to veto any energy bill that does not include access to the Alaskan region for drilling. Why will he not listen? He must have his ears clogged with carbon monoxide. Gregg Ventello is a master's student in Liberal Arts from Cherry Hill, New Jersey. Odi Et Amo appears alternate Mondays.

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