Gabe Oppenheim
Recent articles
Guest Column | Remembering the glory years
Technology has sadly de-emphasized the use of a yearbook for posterity
Gabe Oppenheim | Penn will always be the same, but different
The six laws of the Penn landscape, or, why the University's name will never change and its students will always 'suck.'
Gabe Oppenheim | Penn's crime stats don't fit the mold
National crime patterns suggest that Penn is reporting many burglaries as larcenies, a much less worrisome crime.
Gabe Oppenheim | Can you tell Amy Gutmann from Goldie Hawn?
Gabe Oppenheim quizzes students to see who has the knowledge to discern Penn celebrities from national celebrities.
Gabe Oppenheim | Look to the UA of yore for planning
Previous UA proposals a Palestra park, a massive new student center and many other ideas worth embracing.
Gabe Oppenheim | The Jekyll and Hyde of ZBT
Penn's ZBT fraternity has long had a history of good and bad; the two have finally split up permanently.
Gabe Oppenheim | GET-UP's teaching stats force the wrong conclusion
While GET-UP argues professors aren't teaching many classes, it's lecturers - not grad students - who are teaching most of the rest.
Gabe Oppenheim | If we don't hear of rape, is it not there?
Two decades ago, a Penn report showed widespread assault, but today, students still fear coming forward.
Gabe Oppenheim | She makes us sexy, Harvard be damned
Penn alum Winnifer Culter might not have made Harvard's list of most influential, but few others have the power to get you lovin'.
Gabe Oppenheim | A year later, a much better reaction
For certain AlliedBarton security guards, the stench of garbage and the sight of rats marked the start of every work day for the past several months.
Gabe Oppenheim | Without our help, a beacon of freedom faces death
Our country's most important ally in the war on terror is about to be killed, and most Americans don't even know it.
Gabe Oppenheim | Learning from past segregation
Penn's lack of support for black students forced them to fend for themselves. The University shouldn't make the same mistake with international students.
Gabe Oppenheim: The changing face of admissions
This school year marks the 40th since Penn adopted its modern undergraduate-admissions policy. Not that you'd know: The University hasn't held any essay competitions or thrown any parties, as it did last year in honor of Benjamin Franklin's 300th birthday.
