JOKE ISSUE: Emma Watson chooses Penn for graduate school

The Sorting Hat has spoken — Quaker! Former “Harry Potter” actress Emma Watson confirmed on March 24 that she will attend Penn for graduate school.

Actress and United Nations Goodwill Ambassador Emma Watson, who recently graduated from Brown University this summer with a bachelor’s degree in English Literature, has confirmed that she will be continuing her studies in English at Penn for graduate school.

Kingsley Pennyton, Watson’s publicist, said that after discreetly visiting campus and speaking to individuals from the English Department, Watson fell in love with the school.

“She loved the vibrant atmosphere of the school and how it provides students with a sense of belonging and community while allowing them to be part of a larger, diverse student body,” Pennyton said.

Penn’s status as one of the top graduate schools for English was also a major draw for Watson. According to U.S. News and World Report, Penn is currently tied with Columbia, Princeton and Yale for 4th place for the best graduate English program, after first place University of California, Berkeley, and tied-for-second Harvard and Stanford.

Despite Watson’s superstar status, Pennyton emphasized that she wants to experience normalcy and avoid unwanted attention while on campus.

“She’s a very private person,” Pennyton said. “One of the things she loved about Brown was that people there respected that.”

Pennyton said that people at Brown worked to remain unfazed by her stardom so that she could experience a regular life and form genuine friendships. She was even able to throw a party with 100 guests and not have a single person post a picture on social media. Pennyton states that Watson hopes to experience that kind of community here as well.

Pennyton stated that the department’s dedication and passion for the field coupled with a commitment to interdisciplinary learning resonated with Watson’s own experiences. Watson discovered her metier for acting through her love of poetry when she won a competition reciting James Reeves’s “The Sea” at 7 years old.

“I’m excited,” said Catherine Bennet, head of the Graduate English program. “I think Emma’s beliefs mirror those of the English Department here at Penn. We strive to foster a challenging, inclusive and supportive departmental culture that not only focuses on the core of the subject but also its ramifications and connections to other areas of study.”

Specific details have not been worked out on when she will begin her studies due to her hectic schedule, which includes the release of two new movies this year, “Regression” and “Colonia,” filming for the upcoming live-action adaptation of Disney’s “Beauty and the Beast” and her duties as a Goodwill ambassador for UN Women and advocate for the UN Women’s HeForShe campaign. However, Expecto Patr — to see Emma Watson on campus soon.

Editor's Note: This article is part of the annual DP Joke Issue.

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